Fall 9 Times, Get Up 10, Right?

 

I guess my back thought I was getting too cocky and decided to put me in my place. Friday I dared to speak with my physical therapist about pulling back on some of the meds, namely the muscle relaxers, so that I wouldn’t be so tired all the time.

Saturday I had an amazing day with Nathan, hours spent awake and lucid and off the couch. We went to the library book sale, a meal out, couple of antique stores, the bakery… a delightful day like a regular damn couple.

Saturday was awesome. (You might not know, if you haven’t read the About page, that I’ve essentially been living on my couch since June 20.)

Yesterday was good too! I didn’t have to take any naps and I could actually cook a meal for myself.

Today is not awesome. It’s not the end of the world, but it’s not fun.

This morning I got up and let Rosebud (dog) out, made my coffee and took my morning meds (of which there are many, you can imagine) and set out the dog’s food and water. I sat on the couch and sipped my coffee, worked on some business posts for the day, and snuggled with Rosebud like I do every morning.

Then, about a half hour later, I dared to get up off of the couch. I turned ‘just so’ as I did and that was it. The left side of my back went into a full on “What the cuss?!?” Spasm. My mouth did other things, said other, more colorful things. I knew that moving too far or too quickly just became not even kind of an option. So, I turned on my heating pad (which was thankfully right next to me) and laid down. Laying down is where I’ve stayed.

End-of-the-month is no time for a business person to be out of commission! Are you kidding me?! I had so many plans and To-Do list items running through my mind this morning. I’m lucky, I can work several parts of my business from the #businesscouch, flat on my back.

It’s one of the most brilliant pieces of my business — you can be anyone, working from anywhere, and still get it done if you’ve got that hustle. It just so happened that today I was planning to post a product review video (not in my pajamas, preferably,) color some cards to mail to folks as Thank Yous (I’m big on therapeutic coloring) and talk to some folks who are interested in the business opportunity and joining my team. Oh, and yoga is tonight! Suddenly my To-Do list shrunk to: Stay as still as possible to avoid full blown back outage.

This reminds me, I have to text my yoga partner and tell her I’m out of commission…

As I was laying here thinking about the best plans laid of mice and men and all that, trying to talk myself out of being bummed out, it struck me: Why do we always push the line, “Fall down 9 times, get up 10,” without providing space for the cuss words and tantrum throwing that maybe needs to happen in-between? I don’t ever want to be a person who minimizes anyone’s fall and tells them just to get back up. I hate when people do that shit to me. Plus, sometimes you just need to say it out loud and into the universe:

Today sucks.

But it’s not the end of the world. This mental slump I’m in? I’ll get out of it by tomorrow morning, probably. Here’s my pledge to anyone reading this, any friend or follower or client and even to myself:

I’ll always encourage you to get back up after a fall, but first I’ll give you the space to cuss and throw a tantrum if you need to. 


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2 Comments »

  1. Kelly – this reminds me of your famous meltdown “I JUST WANT A MF-ING PB&J SAMMICH” 🙂

    Proud of you for owning your suck, and for having the balls to climb out of it. I know how much of a challenge that can be, for sure!!

    Liked by 1 person

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